护照在乱闹之后终于还是到了自己的手上．．．
英国签证么．．既没拒牵也没签下来．．．很是莫名
拿到护照的时候心里其实还是很委屈的．．．本应该在１个月前就寄到家里的东西，突然发生了变故，可能会造成很重大的后果，可能不能回国了，对此我做错了什么呢？申请英国签证？他们有什么权利，因为自己的过失，让一个孤身在外的女孩子在过去的几个天里面心神不宁呢？．．．一个上午等在大使馆门口，一个人，开始胡思乱想：如果不能放假不能回国了，怎么办？逃到法国３个月学法语？然后被抓住，遣送回国．那倒真的可以回国了，一辈子回国．．阴阴的天空下，很容易流泪的，然后开始抽泣．．．直到有人从自己身边经过，带着异样的眼神，靠近，询问，安慰．．．如果那个时候，有人在自己身边多好！爸爸妈妈．．．原来，他们真的是我的天．．．永远不会变得阴沉的天．．．

还是庆幸一下吧，终于，可以回国了！

去到malahide已经是下午３点多的事了，天空开始阴晴不定地飘忽着些细雨．有反于爱尔兰最近的作风．

最近的爱尔兰常常是艳阳高照，马路边常常能看到年轻的人们脱了鞋子晒太阳的情景，恣意的样子．．．．．．还有天空，常常是到了晚上９点才开始变暗．

本想好好享受一下逃自习课，海边，艳阳，海风的，可都被那场从小雨变到磅礴大雨的雨水搞咋了．

幸好雨最终还是停了．在阴阴的天空下，海边没有什么人．其实那个也不算海边吧，更像是湖．．．很平静的样子．．．还有很大很大的沙滩，坑坑凹凹的积着纯净到不行的雨水？湖水？海水？让人情不自禁地脱下了鞋子，往海那边走？．．．．是不是很像小时侯的野孩子，赤着脚在水里面到处游走？很自由？．．．虚假而已．．．即使是在那个只有２个人的沙滩，那个看上去没有尽头的浅浅的海水，又能承载得了多少呢？

最近痴迷于一部韩剧：宫．．．脑子里面常常会不由自主的想着里面的片段．

倔强的太子vs温柔的太子第二继承人．．．你会选哪个呢？

从开始坚定而又执着的选择温柔，到最后的选择：太子，才发现自己原来是这么不了解自己．一个容易改变并且容易感到厌倦的家伙．．．都不知道该拿自己如何是好了．．．

有人劝我说：时间会改变一切的．等长大了，心就会收了．．．但是，真的会吗？．．．如果不会怎么办呢？曾经的幸福在自己身边停留，而自己却麻木地将它们推开．究竟自己想要的是什么，其实自己也不知道．．．

清醒地迷茫着．．．

AKON LYRICS 

Lonely 

Lonely I'm so lonely,
I have nobody,
For my owwnnn
I'm so lonely, I'm Mr. Lonely
I have nobody, 
For my owwnnn
I'm so lonely, 

Yo this one here goes out to all my

playas out there ya kno got to have one

good girl whose always been there like

ya
Kno took all the bullshit then one day

she cant take it no more and decides to

leave

I woke up in the middle of the night and

I noticed my girl wasn't by my side,

coulda sworn I was dreamin, for her I

was
Feenin, so I hadda take a little ride,

back tracking ova these few years, tryna

figure out wat I do to make it go bad,

cuz
Ever since my girl left me, my whole

life came crashin

I'm so lonely (so lonely),
I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
To call my own (to call my own) girl

I'm so lonely (so lonely)
I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
To call my own (to call my own) girl

Cant belive I hadda girl like you and I

just let you walk right outta my life,

after all I put u thru u still stuck
Around and stayed by my side, what

really hurt me is I broke ur heart, baby

you were a good girl and I had no right,

I
Really wanna make things right, cuz

without u in my life girl

I'm so lonely (so lonely)
I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody to call my

own)
To call my own (to call my own) girl

I'm so lonely (so lonely)
I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
To call my own (to call my own) girl

Been all about the world ain't neva met

a girl that can take the things that you

been through
Never thought the day would come where

you would get up and run and I would be

out chasing u
Cuz aint nowhere in the globe id rather

be, aint noone in the globe id rather

see then the girl of my dreams that made

me
Be so happy but now so lonely

So lonely (so lonely)
I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
To call my own (to call my own) 

I'm so lonely (so lonely)
I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
To call my own (to call my own) girrll

Never thought that id be alone, I didnt

hope you'd be gone this long, I jus want

u to call my phone, so stop playing girl

and
Come on home (come on home), baby girl I

didn't mean to shout, I want me and you

to work it out, I never wished Id ever
Hurt my baby, and its drivin me crazy

cuz...

I'm so lonely (so lonely)
I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
To call my own (to call my own) 

I'm so lonely (so lonely)
I'm Mr. Lonely (Mr. Lonely)
I have nobody (I have nobody)
To call my own (to call my own) girll

Lonely, so lonely
So lonely, (so lonely),
Mr. Lonely, so lonely
So lonely, so lonely, (so lonely), Mr.

Lonely